Protect Yourself From Energy Vampires-xpphone

Inspirational (Adapted from Positive Energy: Ten Extraordinary Prescriptions for Transforming Fatigue, Stress, and Fear Into Vibrance, Strength, and Love) The quality of our relationships affects our health. Our relationships are governed by a give and take of energy. Some people, whether coworkers, friends or relatives, make us more electric or at ease. Yet others suck the life right out of us. As a physician and energy specialist I want to verify that energy vampires roam the world sapping our exuberance. With patients and in my workshops I’ve seen their fang marks and the carnage they’ve strewn. But most of us don’t know how to identify and cope with vampires, so we mope around as unwitting casualties, enduring a preventable fatigue. In Positive Energy I discuss some types of energy vampires to watch for and ways to deal with them. Vampire #1: The Sob Sister Every time you talk to her she’s whining. She adores a captive audience. She’s the coworker or friend with the poor me attitude who’s more interested in complaining than solutions. How to Protect Yourself : Set clear boundaries. Limit the time you spend talking about her complaints. With a firm but kind attitude say, I’m sorry I can only talk for a few minutes today. And go on with your work. Vampire #2: The Drama Queen This vampire has a flair for exaggerating small incidents into off-the-chart dramas. My patient Sarah was exhausted when she hired a new employee who was always late for work. One week he had the flu and almost died. Next, his car was towed, again! After this employee left her office, Sarah felt tired and used. How to Protect Yourself : A drama queen doesn’t get mileage out of equanimity. Stay calm. Take a few deep breaths. This will help you not get caught up in the histrionics. Set kind but firm limits. Say, You must be here on time to keep your job. I’m sorry for all your mishaps, but work comes first. Vampire #3: The Constant Talker or Joke Teller He has no interest in your feelings; he’s only concerned with himself. Initially, he might seem entertaining, but when the talking doesn’t stop, you begin to get tired. You wait for an opening to get a word in edgewise but it never comes. Or he might physically move in so close he’s practically breathing on you. You edge backwards, but without missing a beat, he steps closer again. One patient said about one relative, Whenever I get together with him my colon goes into spasm. How to Protect Yourself : Know that these people don’t respond to nonverbal cues. You must speak up and interrupt. Listen for a few minutes- then from a neutral place politely say, I’m a quiet person, so please excuse me for not talking a long timea much more constructive tack than Keep quiet, you’re driving me crazy! Vampire #4: The Fixer Upper This vampire is desperate for you to fix her endless problemsat all hours. She turns you into her therapist. At lunch, she’ll make a b-line to your desk, monopolizing your free time. Or it could be a friend who constantly calls you with dilemmas. Her neediness lures you in. How to Protect Yourself : Do not become the rescuer. Show empathy but resist offering solutions. Be supportive but tell her, I’m confident you’ll find the right solution or sensitively suggest that she seek a qualified professional for help. Vampire #5: The Blamer This vampire has a sneaky way of making you feel guilty or lacking for not getting things just right. Whenever my patient Marie, a book editor, sees her boss she’s on guard; her boss had a way of cutting her down that saps her energy. She always has a negative comment to make. How to Protect Yourself : Try this visualization. Around this person imagine yourself surrounded by a cocoon of white light. Think of it as a protective covering that keeps you from being harmed. Tell yourself that you are safe and secure here. The cocoon filters out the negativity so it can’t deplete you. Vampire #6: Go For The Jugular Fiend This type is vindictive and cuts you down with no consideration for your feelings. He says things like, Forget that man. He’s out of your league. These jabs can be so hurtful it’s hard to get them out of your head. How to Protect Yourself : Eliminate them from your life whenever possible. For a boss or mother-in-law who isn’t going anywhere try a visualization that put you at a distance from them, and refuse to ingest the poison. Realize that he or she is a wounded person; try not to take their meanness personally. About the Author: Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, energy expert, and author of the bestseller ‘Positive Energy: Ten Extraordinary Prescriptions For Transforming Fatigue, Stress, and Fear Into Vibrance, Strength and Love’, upon which this article is based. She is offering a workshop The Power of Intuition and Positive Energy to Heal" at Esalen Institute, Big Sur, Calif. October 5-7, 2007. For more information on books and workshops visit: Article Published On: – Inspirational 相关的主题文章: